A Paragraph With The Mariners – 24

You know how people like to say, “It’s so hard to play sports in New York/Boston/Chicago/Philly/Dallas” because the expectations are so much greater, and they’re in such a fishbowl, and the media is such a monster.” Well, that’s bullshit. I think it’s been proven time and time again that SEATTLE is the toughest place to come and play sports. Because, just about EVERY FUCKING TIME we sign someone from Free Agency, they suck about a thousand dicks and then fall off the face of the Earth. See: Chone Figgins (.204 BA), Casey Kotchman (.211 BA), Richie Suxson & Adrian Beltre, and of course Capt. Meltdown himself, Milton Bradley (who’s currently on the Restricted List for what I’m speculating to be stress-induced dementia). Please, give me the name of the last Yankee, Red Sox, or Mets player who had to go on the RESTRICTED LIST because of the stress of playing in New York or Boston … I’m waiting … … Is it because Seattle isn’t stressful enough? Is our media too soft and our fans’ expectations too low? So, they come here and they have to manufacture all this pressure they put on themselves? Because, I gotta tell you, you REALLY couldn’t have picked an easier city to please. Make a few diving catches, hit a few home runs or game winners, and we don’t really care if you win 105 or 85 games. We just like watchin’ good guys havin’ fun. We don’t, however, like watchin’ good guys losin’ 6 straight home games in getting swept by Texas and Tampa. Oh, and here’s Anaheim Los Angeles up next! Goodie goodie! Has a home team not playing in Pittsburgh or Kansas City ever lost all the games of a 9-game homestand?

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