Justin Smoak Is Awesome

Just another 3 for 4 night, that’s all.  A homer, a double, no big deal.

Except, HEY, it is a big deal!  I can’t remember the last time we had a guy who we could count on to get us the big hits when we needed them.

Oh sure, every once in a while a guy like Adrian Beltre would have a big game.  Maybe once in a blue moon someone like Jack Wilson would squeak a couple doubles down the line within the same 9-inning stretch.  But to have a guy, right smack dab in the middle of the order, who isn’t afraid of the spotlight, who isn’t over-burdened by the pressure of playing on a light-hitting ballclub, who doesn’t chase ever single fucking low-and-away change up the other team throws … I mean, it’s extraordinary!

I’m not gonna lie to you, I’m tired of that guy.  The Jose Lopez, Miguel Olivo, Michael Saunders, Richie Sexson, Russell Branyan type.  No eye for pitches, swinging out of their shoes to try to rope the ball out of the yard, ultimately the most predictable hitters who’ve ever lived.  If they’re not aggressively going after first-pitch fastballs (which, for some reason, they NEVER are), then they automatically fall behind in the count and pull a Serrano from Major League:

Bats, they are sick. I cannot hit curveball. Straightball I hit it very much. Curveball, bats are afraid. I ask Jobu to come, take fear from bats. I offer him cigar, rum. He will come.

Justin Smoak, on the other hand, looks like a capable fucking human being!  He’s NOT over-anxious at the plate.  He lets the pitcher come to him and then HE dictates what’s going to happen.  I’m telling you, if you’re able to lay off that bendy shit, you’re going to look a MILLION times better with a bat in your hand.

I mean, you’d think if you were playing the game long enough, you’d be able to recognize what a pitch looks like when it’s about to fall out of the strike zone!

The best part of this month and change is being able to see Smoak emerge before our very eyes; from a kid struggling to make the transition from AAA to the major leagues, to a man absolutely crushing the ball off of AL pitchers.

He has 28 hits this year in 89 at-bats.  13 of those 28 hits (ALMOST HALF!!!1) are extra-base hits (8 doubles, 5 homers).  He’s also got 15 walks to only 21 strikeouts.  Add it all up and you know what you’ve got?  A .983 OPS, which I don’t need to tell you is fucking outstanding.  That’s a Babe Ruthian OPS right there!

I really hope he keeps it up.  And, shit, I hope the team keeps it up too!  We’ve got nothing but good things in Marinerland the last couple weeks; enjoy it.  I SAID ENJOY IT, MOTHERFUCKERS!  Get out to the ballpark and take in a game once in a while, Christ!

Leave a Reply