I Beg Of You: Don’t Get All Caught Up In The Daily Minutiae Of The Seattle Mariners

You know what’s NOT interesting?  Talking about batting lineups two months after a season has started.  Banging your head against the wall because Chone Figgins wasn’t released when Miguel Olivo came back from the DL.  Further banging of your head against the wall because Miguel Olivo came back from the DL and returned to playing pretty much every day.  Calling for Brandon League’s outright release because he blew a few games.  Calling for the team to move the fences in.  Whining because the Mariners aren’t hitting all that well of late.

It’s just not important.  Like, at all.  This season is fucked and that’s it, so why get all worked up about these minor details that will be forgotten in a month’s time?

Pissed because Ichiro isn’t an RBI machine in the 3-hole?  Who cares?  He’s still going to continue to play every day because he’s making $18 million and because he’s still the best for-average hitter on this team.

Pissed because Chone Figgins is still here?  Too bad!  He signed a 4-year contract and this team isn’t in the business of throwing away money.  Get used to the idea of Chone Figgins, because he’s still got a year and four months left on his deal.  He’s going to be the most highly paid reserve in baseball until he’s not.

Pissed because Miguel Olivo is playing too often?  I don’t know what to tell you.  He’s the team’s starting catcher and teams don’t just supplant starting veterans willy nilly.  When Montero shows he’s capable of doing it all, then he’ll get more playing time at Catcher.  Jaso is still going to play enough – it’s not like he’s a starting-calibre guy anyway.

Pissed because Brandon League sucks?  Yeah, I’m kinda pissed about that too.  But, they’re not just going to release a guy with his skillset, so quit being retarded!  They’re going to give the guy every opportunity to build back up his trade value, then they’re going to trade him at the end of July.  Either way, he’s not long for this team (because if they can’t ship him off, he’s still not going to re-sign at season’s end), so just calm down.

Pissed because the fences prevent homers and mess with the heads of our hitters?  Tell it to the judge.  This team has known pretty much since Safeco was completed that it would make scoring runs a chore, but what makes you think this team is going to do anything about it?  The front office won’t even stop reducing payroll because its team has sucked for so long fans have stopped coming to games; what makes you think they’re going to go to the trouble of problem-solving?  If you want to get pissed about anything, get pissed because these owners are still in charge.  And start praying that they’ll soon sell to a local buyer willing to do what it takes to put a winner on the Major League field.

Pissed because the Mariners can’t score?  What else is new?  Just be glad they’re marginally better than the last two years of historic ineptitude.

I’m sorry, but I can’t get all that worked up about this stupid, boring shit anymore.  This team is now 11 games behind the Rangers with two more games to play before the month ends.  We will likely be 13 games back by June 1st.  Just sit back, relax, and look forward to all the Felix Days we’re still blessed with.  They’re better than nothing.  Hell, that should be the team’s slogan:

The Seattle Mariners:  They’re Better Than Nothing.

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