Seattle Mariners – Totally And Royally Fucked Up

I got nothing.  Five losses in a row, all at home, all against teams you’re directly competing against for the Wild Card.

This one was on Gallardo, because he’s a piece of shit, no-dick loser who gave up 8 runs in 4 innings.  He forced the M’s to use Casey Lawrence for 4 innings, who gave up 3 runs of his own.  The only even REMOTELY interesting thing about this game was the Major League Debut of Thyago Vieira, who’s able to hit 100mph on the reg.  He struck out 1 in his 1 inning of work.

The offense, again, didn’t do a whole lot, but what do you expect?  First pitch of the game, Gallardo gave up a homer.  The M’s were able to get one back in the bottom half of the first, but not to be out-done, Gallardo proceeded to give up 6 more runs in the second.  Just like that, it’s 7-1 and we can all go fuck ourselves.

I know it’s standard operating procedure for the Mariners to have these runs of brilliance, followed by these soul-crushing runs of ineptitude, but as you probably gleaned by now, it’s getting a little late in the season for this bullshit.  At this point, I have to start wondering if it’s the pressure.  If it’s just too much for this team.  Are they not able to handle success?  Is the thought of a playoff Mariners team so foreign to them that it melts their brains?  Believe you me, if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes lo those 16 years ago, I don’t think I’d believe it myself.

This loss drops the Mariners to 2.5 games out of the second Wild Card.  59-61, tied with Tampa, behind the likes of Anaheim, Minnesota, Kansas City, and Baltimore; just a half game ahead of Texas and a full game ahead of Toronto.

Today, we get the Mariners debut of Andrew Albers.  He last started a game in the Majors in September of last year.  He’s been killing it in AAA this year in the Braves’ organization and recently came over in a trade for cash or some damn thing.  I’m sure he’s terrible; nothing to see here.

I’m starting to really regret the decision to write a post for every single Mariners game.

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