The Seahawks Were A Hot Mess In Hot, Humid Tennessee

Just when you think the Seahawks are getting to be boring or predictable to write about (what’s that, another slow start spoiling an otherwise winnable game?), they go and zag when you expect them to zig.

Well, you may have expected this game to be a zig, but I saw this zag coming a mile away!

Everyone’s all surprised about Tennessee’s offense really sticking it to our defense, but this was always going to be a terrible matchup for the Seahawks.  They have a GREAT offensive line, so that right there neutralizes one of our team’s best assets:  the D-Line.  The pass rush was neutralized (I read somewhere that the Seahawks were only credited with 2 pressures all day), and more importantly, our rush defense was non-existent.  Remember in 2014, when we hosted the Cowboys and they ran the ball all over us (with DeMarco Murray at the helm, btw)?  Yeah, that times a thousand.  195 total yards rushing, on a 5.6 yards per carry average, with a long of 75!  DeMarco Murray was supposed to only play sparingly because he was dealing with an injury, and he looked like fucking Superman out there!

So yeah, there was that.  Then, factor in Marcus Mariota:  he’s not going to push the ball down the field.  He’s going to take what the defense gives him, make smart decisions, and keep moving the chains.  Then, when he gets into the red zone, he’s going to make enough plays to ensure his team scores.  While they didn’t hit on every red zone appearance, they didn’t need to.  From the second quarter on, they scored on 7 of 8 drives.  When you move the ball that well, you don’t NEED to score touchdowns every time to be effective and win the game!  But, more importantly, by not challenging the Seahawks deep through the air, that neutralizes another of our team’s best assets:  the secondary.

With the D-Line and the secondary reduced to nothing, it should surprise no one that the Titans were able to score at will.

I think the Seahawks opened some eyes on offense though.  No one should be crowing, or otherwise satisfied with what the offense was able to do; we’ve seen this movie too!  The Seahawks start slow on the road, get down big, and scramble to make a furious comeback.  In this case, the Seahawks actually managed to grab a 7-6 lead late in the second quarter, after punting on their first six drives.  A Prevent Defense prevented the Seahawks from going into halftime with the lead, as the Titans were able to kick another field goal to go up 9-7.  Then, the Seahawks took the opening drive of the second half down for a TD, and a 14-9 lead, and I think everyone sort of settled in, secure that the Seahawks would FINALLY take over the ballgame.

That’s when the Titans went on their run, making the score 30-14 going into the fourth quarter.  As they do, the Seahawks turned the engines back on, pulling to within 30-20.  They failed at their 2-point conversion (because if you think they’re bad in the red zone, you should SEE how wretched they are at going for 2), but still had plenty of time for a couple more scores.

Where they really lost the game was on the subsequent Titans drive.  Tennessee held the ball for 4 minutes and drove down for a field goal to make it 33-20 with about 10 minutes to go.  At that point, not only would the Seahawks need two touchdowns, but they’d somehow need to get a STOP, which seemed like the least likely of the two scenarios.

Of course, the Seahawks did neither, as they were forced to punt on their next drive.  Sure, the D finally rose up for a 3 & Out, but at that point so much time had run off the clock that the Seahawks would need two TDs in just over 5 minutes.  They would get one, but the on-side kick was as pathetic as everything else about the Seahawks that day, and that was that.

Russell Wilson threw for 373 yards and 4 TDs, which is awesome for a fantasy football team, but it’s honestly not going to win the Seattle Seahawks very many ballgames.  If he has to throw the ball 49 times, then guess what?  That means our defense stinks.  And, for as good as that day looks, there were still plenty of missed opportunities that he wasn’t able to take advantage of.  This offense isn’t good enough to carry a crappy defense, so I hate everything about this stat line.

I really want to call out Darrell Bevell here, because yeah I know he’s the easy mark, and I know it’s like beating a dead horse, but he’s a fucking moron.  The Seahawks ran the ball on the first play of the game for no gain, then passed twice before it turned into a 3 & Out.  Next Drive:  3 passes, and another 3 & Out.  Next Drive:  we get a first down on first down through the air, then Carson runs twice for 11 yards to get the ball into Tennessee territory, then … 3 incomplete passes and a punt.  Next Drive:  he returns to the run game which nets 9 yards, but fails on 3rd & 1.  Nice idea, but poor execution.  Next Drive:  3 more incomplete passes for the 3 & Out.

I mean, look, it was a hot day.  90+ degrees in Tennessee.  I know this team’s “identity” or whatever isn’t to speed up the offense, but you could’ve fooled me.  What are all these incomplete passes if not speeding up the time between when the defense is out there on the field.  And, with all their nonsense early in the game – highlighted by Richard Sherman’s meltdown, followed by his late hit out of bounds on the quarterback – I have no doubt in my mind it tired them out, rendering them useless in the second half.

Also, not for nothing, but I have absolutely no problem with how you want to protest for your causes.  Stand for the anthem, sit for the anthem, pull the flag out and take a shit on it on midfield in front of tens of thousands of people; WHATEVER.  But, when I read about how the team is spending 3+ hours on how they’re going to protest the anthem the next day … I dunno, that seems like time that could be spent on preparing for the other team!

Again, I’m all for you standing up for what you believe in, but if it’s going to continuously interfere with your performance on the field, then I gotta say:  why should I care about the causes of a bunch of losers?  You know where you’ll have the biggest impact to pass along your message?  At the FUCKING Super Bowl, so how about you start playing like you give a shit about this fucking game, or go hang out on the fucking sidelines while we find some guys who want to win.

I follow sports because I like watching sports.  While I agree with your right to protest – and while I agree that people of color are treated pretty shitty in this country – I only actually give a shit about football when I’m watching football.  If I want an endless parade of politics, I’ll go on Twitter and blow my fucking brains out, thanks.

Seahawks Death Week: The “2016 The Year” Of Football Seasons

There’s just nothing to like about that season by the Seattle Seahawks.  Not a damn bit of good came from it.  That’s two years in a row of spinning our tires in the mud, with not a lot to show for it.  All we got was another year older.  Instead of being the next great dynasty, we’re just another good team.  One Super Bowl win, with the hope that we’re able to squeeze another one out of Russell Wilson before he moves on.  More and more, it’s looking like instead of a Brady/Manning/Roethlisberger situation, we’ve got a Drew Brees situation.  Maybe one title is all this group gets.  Maybe we spend the rest of our time with this core just slowly getting worse, until it’s just Wilson and Carroll, and a bunch of stiffs, regularly finishing in 3rd and 4th place in the NFC West.

The worst part is, I don’t even know how to define this season.  Yeah, the O-Line stunk, but they didn’t stink in every single game.  Yeah, we lost Earl Thomas, but there were plenty of times where this defense looked inept with Thomas in there.  If you go game by game, it’s a pretty frustrating exercise.

***

The Seahawks barely beat the Dolphins at home in week 1; the offensive line was definitely our primary fault in that one.  Wilson’s ankle got rolled up on, and that was the genesis of Hobbled Russell Wilson.

The Seahawks lost on the road to the Rams in week 2; again, the O-Line was crushed.  We lost three field goals to one, in the second game where the offense was totally out of sorts.

The 49ers were some home cooking in week 3; but, then Wilson got rolled up on again, this time injuring his knee, sending him to work with a brace for the rest of the regular season.  No fun there.

The Jets on the road were supposed to be a big test in week 4; they ended up being 5-11 on the year and one of the worst teams in the NFL.  The Seahawks, with Hobbled Russell Wilson, won by 10 points and settled into a much-needed BYE week.

The Seahawks were able to squeak by the Falcons in week 6; I think we all know enough of that game.  One bright spot was that, even in spite of a disastrous third quarter, we were able to fend off a last-minute drive, like we weren’t able to do in 2015.  The defense, when most everyone was healthy, was certainly better in 2016 than 2015; but the defense was rarely healthy.

Just when we were hoping to build on some momentum of a 3-game winning streak, we went and tied the Cardinals in week 7.  The third game out of six for the Seahawks where the offense was absolutely manhandled.  Of course, had Hauschka not been a ninny, this would’ve been a win.

The Seahawks followed that up with a road trip to New Orleans, and a baffling defeat in week 8; but, a defeat very similar to ones we have every year.  Not a good look for our defense, but the fact that our offense was held to 13 points (the other 7 attributed to an Earl Thomas fumble return for TD) against that defense is unconscionable.  Four games out of seven where the offense was a fucking trainwreck.

The Seahawks played the Bills on Monday Night Football in week 9; turns out Rex & Rob Ryan are the cures for what ails this offense.  It was less encouraging for our defense to give up 25, but they were able to foil a 2-minute drive at the end of the game to lock it up (again, shades of this not being the 2015 season).

In a game everyone expected the Seahawks to lose, they went into New England on Sunday night and upset the Pats 31-24.  Even with Michael Bennett on the shelf, this was a watershed game for our defense, as Kam returned and locked down Gronk in New England’s final series.  This was also a coming out party for C.J. Prosise, showing what this offense can do when it has a healthy, dynamic running back.

The Seahawks followed this up with a dominating performance over a then-contending Eagles team at home in week 11.  Prosise had another big impact in this game, with a 72-yard touchdown run, before leaving injured and not returning for the rest of the season.  Not a ton of people talking about the loss of Prosise as the 2016 Seahawks’ downfall, but let’s just say if we’d had him healthy for the full season, things might’ve gone a lot differently for this offense.

On the heels of another 3-game winning streak – and probably the best 3-game stretch for this team in the 2016 season – the Seahawks went to Tampa in week 12 and had their fifth terrible offensive game of the season.  This one is all on the O-Line, but one could argue things might have gone differently had Britt been healthy.  Either way, after going down 14-0 in the first quarter, and giving up no points the rest of the way, that was a real missed opportunity for the Seahawks, allowing the Bucs to hang around in contention for a while longer.

Injured guys started trickling back for the next game, at home, against the Panthers in week 13.  Britt was back, Bennett was back, Rawls had worked his way back to being a workhorse, Wilson was on the mend.  For the first time in a long time, things were FINALLY looking up for the Seahawks.  We crushed the Panthers, 40-7, and this was around the same time where we always go on our late-season runs of dominance.  But, because 2016 is the fucking worst, this was the same game where Earl Thomas broke his leg and was lost for the season.  Hashtag WeCantHaveNiceThings.

It was hard not to be deflated over the Thomas injury, but I refused to believe things would fall apart just because he was out.  We still had Kam after all!  Well, week 14’s game in Green Bay should’ve been our first clue that the rest of this year would just be a formality.  Aaron Rodgers did Aaron Rodgers things and the Seahawks were blown out for the first time since 2011.  Also, this was the sixth terrible offensive game, but mostly due to Russell Wilson’s interceptions.

In week 15, we handled the Rams on Thursday Night Football, in the game where Richard Sherman put Darrell Bevell on blast.  He would go on to put most everyone else on blast the rest of the year, in what should’ve been our second clue that the rest of this year would just be a formality.  The Seahawks don’t lose their cool.  Even when they lose their cool, it’s for a reason.  There wasn’t much of a reason for this.

In spite of the Seahawks being an up-and-down team, they held their fate in their hands.  All they needed to do was beat an underwhelming Cardinals team at home, then finish off the 49ers on the road.  Simple, right?  Win those two games, lock down the 2-seed.  Lock down the 2-seed, get the first round BYE.  Get the first round BYE, then host the Falcons in the Divisional Round instead of the other way around, and maybe our crowd does enough damage to their offense to allow the Seahawks to win and host the NFC Championship Game for the third time in four seasons.  But, the defense gave up 34 points to the Cardinals in week 16, and all of that was washed away.  The third and final clue that the rest of this year would just be a formality:  now we’d be a 3-seed, be forced to play in the Wild Card round, and have to go on the road to the Falcons, where we would go on to lose.

The Seahawks were able to take down the 49ers in week 17, but it was a lot closer than it should’ve been.  Was it us taking it easy, knowing the Falcons would lock up the 2-seed in a matter of hours?  Was it the defense continuing to struggle without Earl Thomas?

Then, the big Wild Card win at home.  The last hurrah, over a pretty inept and banged up Lions team.  Not a lot to learn from that, and ultimately the next game would look nothing like this one.

***

I mean, how do you wrap your head around a season like that?

To start, you can’t say a damn thing about it without getting into the offensive line issues.  This was the second year in a row that the Seahawks went with a bullshit, makeshift O-Line, instead of ponying up the money for proper blockers.  Justin Britt had his position moved for the third time in three seasons, and that was the ONLY move that worked.  He’ll go into the final year of his rookie deal in 2017 as our starting center; that makes me happy.  You can take the other four guys and throw them in a fucking volcano for all I care.

The Seahawks, in their prime, 2012-2014, always got by with Just Okay offensive lines.  Adequate, middle-of-the-road, doing just enough to let Marshawn Lynch run by them, and to let Russell Wilson run around them.  Then, slowly but surely, all the good parts were stripped away:  Unger traded away; Giacomini, Carpenter, and Sweezy allowed to hit free agency; Russell Okung – probably the most talented of the bunch – also allowed to hit free agency and sign a terrible deal in Denver.  Ending up with two rookies, a second-year player getting his first starting action, a third-year player switching positions for the third time, and Garry Gilliam, the only guy starting in the same spot from the year before.  Oh, and don’t forget the two free agents – Sowell and Webb – who were terrible, lost their starting jobs, and won’t be around beyond this season.

And, I get it.  I understand what the Seahawks were doing.  There’s only so much money to go around, and they preferred to give that money to their star players at the skill positions.  Wilson, Baldwin, Graham, Bennett, Avril, Wagner, Wright, Thomas, Sherman, Chancellor.  Those guys take up a lot of money.  Where can we save?  The O-Line!  Hell, we’ve got Tom Cable, surely he can build them up to be respectable by season’s end!

They damn near did it in 2015.  It looked like, once Patrick Lewis took over at center, things settled down for that unit.  Then, we got into the Divisional Round, against the Panthers and their ferocious interior linemen, and that unit was reduced to rubble.

But, without much of a choice, they did the same thing again in 2016.  As I mentioned, Britt was moved to center and that worked.  Glowinski was drafted in 2015 to be a guard of the future for this team, so why not let him work on his craft in actual games?  Germain Ifedi came at the price of a first round draft pick in 2016, so there was no way he wasn’t starting.  They made it through the season mostly unscathed, and you can ALMOST see a future with those guys in those spots, but they’ve got a lot of work to do.

And, while the guards made PLENTY of mistakes, and were often the worst parts of this unit, in my book they’re taking a back seat to the tackles, who were God-fucking-awful.  George Fant was a tight end in college, and here he was as our starting left tackle.  He was almost constantly over-matched, when we weren’t chipping defensive ends with our tight ends and running backs to give him a little help.  Gilliam was a little better – particularly later in the season, when he essentially had his manhood questioned by the coaching staff – but he too was often overmatched.  Together, neither of them are starting talents in the NFL.  Gilliam is a guy who might be a swing tackle for a good team, a 6th guy on the line who can start for you in a pinch.  But, he has no business being in there everyday.  Fant should’ve had this year to just develop in the background, but since this organization did absolutely nothing to replace Okung – aside from signing Sowell, who is a known commodity as one of the worst tackles in football – Fant was put in a position he had no business being in.  And, in that sense, he did all right.  He could be another guy who is a quality swing tackle, but he probably shouldn’t be a starter either.

This team needs, at a minimum, two new offensive tackles.  Ideally, one high in the draft and one as a free agent.  Luckily, we’ve weathered the storm of our salary cap being up against it, and should have enough extra money to make some moves, as 2017’s cap looks to be up to $170 million or more.  Not so luckily, we draft 26th again, and no quality offensive tackles will be there waiting for us.  I don’t know what the free agent market is going to be like, but things are going to get REALLY salty in Seattle if this team sits back and does nothing.

***

Aside from that, it’s a lot to do with what I was talking about yesterday:  our shoddy depth.  Starting with the 2013 draft, let’s look at who panned out:

  • Luke Willson – backup tight end
  • Spencer Ware – quality running back who we waived; he’s playing well for the Chiefs
  • Paul Richardson – 4th receiver, started coming on in this year’s playoffs with Lockett injured
  • Justin Britt – starting center, with 2016 being his first good year
  • Cassius Marsh – backup pass rusher & special teamer, 3 career sacks
  • Frank Clark – quality defensive lineman
  • Tyler Lockett – quality receiver & returner
  • Mark Glowinski – guard, started in 2016
  • Germain Ifedi – guard, started in 2016
  • Jarran Reed – quality run-stuffing defensive tackle
  • C.J. Prosise – quality running back who can’t stay healthy

That’s it, and I’m really stretching the definition of “panned out” with some of these guys.  The quality guys who we still have on this team include:  Britt, Clark, Lockett, Reed, and Prosise.  Beyond that, when you talk about this team’s depth, it’s a lot of young guys who haven’t really gotten a chance to start – because they’ve been boxed out by all the studs we’ve got starting on this team – but these same guys also aren’t making the most of their opportunities when they do find themselves on the field.  That means the coaches are failing them, or that they’re just not working very hard, but I don’t think this coaching staff or this team would sit by and let a bunch of slackers fuck around in practice.

Also, not for nothing, but when I talk about depth, I’m mostly looking at the secondary.  The depth on the O-Line is, I’m sure, a real problem, but so are the starters, so why beat that dead horse?  There’s solid depth at receiver – as shown by how P-Rich stepped his game up in the playoffs this year like a fucking CHAMP!  PROUD of you, boy! – and at tight end.  There’s also good-enough depth at D-Line and in the linebackers’ room to get by.  Where this team – and particularly this defense – struggles is when we get into the depth in the secondary.  When Kam Chancellor goes down (as he seems to do every year now), and when Earl Thomas goes down.  When, inevitably, Richard Sherman goes down (because he’s such a monster tackler; I can’t imagine those shoulders will hold up forever).  Or, like in this last game, where Shead went down with what looks like an ACL.  We thought Jeremy Lane would be enough – and I think he did okay, I’m not in this big hurry to run him off the team – but this team needs more back there.  It’s a shame too, because that’s supposed to be Pete Carroll’s specialty.  He should be ashamed of the depth we had back there in the secondary – particularly at safety – and he should be looking to shore that up in a major way in the upcoming draft.

No team stays healthy for a full year, but you’ve got to have guys to come in there and pick up the slack.  We weren’t able to do that this year.  That, and our O-Line troubles, doomed us for two years in a row.

It sounds insane to be this disgruntled about a team that hasn’t been to a Super Bowl in the last two years, but that’s what comes with success.  We’re not very far from those teams, in terms of talent and in terms of years, but we’re also trending in the absolute opposite direction.

The Seahawks Regressed, Lost To The Bucs

I’m having a hard time giving a shit about the Seahawks losing to Tampa, if I’m being honest.  Have you heard about this local university football team that’s been kicking ass and taking names this season?  I’m on too much of a high (or, at the very least, an upside down rollercoaster), and it’s overwhelming my feelings about the Seahawks right now.

I want to say I saw this coming, but that’d be a lie; I picked the Seahawks to win in my local pick ’em pool and suffered accordingly.  But, let’s just say the outcome doesn’t necessarily shock me.

Earl Thomas was out, DeShawn Shead was out, Michael Bennett was STILL out, and, fuck, who knows?  Maybe more important than all of those guys was the fact that Justin Britt was out.  From the looks of things, it didn’t feel like Joey Hunt did a terrible job – though, I did see him get turned around on some stunts and whatnot – but this was just a total breakdown from every offensive line position.  Hell, Garry Gilliam was pulled in favor of Bradley Sowell, for Christ’s sake!  But, he wasn’t the only one fucking up, leading to pressure on over 60% of our passes.  Ifedi looked like he took a step back, Glowinski was getting burned on the reg, and Fant looked exactly like an undrafted rookie should look in protecting Wilson’s blindside.  Considering all the progress the Seahawks had made to this point in the season, one has to wonder if Britt not being there really threw this line for a loop.  He calls out all the protections and whatnot, and by simply losing the continuity the line had shared in recent weeks, maybe that was the catalyst to the Bucs’ front four absolutely destroying us.

Either way, it led to Wilson being held to 151 yards passing with 0 TDs and 2 INTs.  He was able to salvage something in the run game for the first time all year, thanks to 80 yards on 8 carries (and he could’ve had A LOT more on some zone reads he ended up handing off when he should’ve pulled it).  Nevertheless, you’re never going to do well when you’re giving up 6 sacks and however many pressures.

Make no mistake, though, Wilson was off.  He was off-target on most of his deep throws; pressure in his face or no, he’s usually better able to drop those balls into the arms of his receivers.  I don’t know if it was tentativeness from expecting the pressure to get to him every snap, but it also looked like the receivers were having a hard time getting open.  I think maybe Darrell Bevell tried to stick to the down-field passing game too much, when we maybe should’ve gone back to the quick passes earlier.

And, if I never see the fucking fullback dive on 3rd & 1 or 4th & 1, it’ll be too fucking soon BEVELL!

But, I mean, what can you do?  I can’t put it all on any one person, because this is the team we’ve constructed.  It’s bound to be better once we get totally healthy (IF we get totally healthy), but the O-Line is probably going to struggle more often than not against really good front fours.

Did we underrate Tampa’s pass rush?  Probably a little bit.  It’s also probably a totally different football game if it’s played in Seattle, not for nothing.

Anyway, I’m not too worried about this one.  Sure, it sucked, and watching a Seahawks game when the offense is totally incapable of moving the football is worse than being strapped into a chair with your eyes forced open, facing a 48-hour Big Bang Theory marathon, but nothing has changed from where we were last week.  The Seahawks still hold the 2-seed (and, after the Cowboys beat the Redskins on Thanksgiving, you had to know it was going to be HIGHLY improbable for the Seahawks to pick up two games on Dallas in the last 5 weeks, so the 1-seed was never likely going to happen anyway), with a half-game lead over Detroit and Atlanta.  Detroit has three of its last five on the road, and has to face the Giants, Cowboys, Packers and Saints the rest of the way.  Atlanta, you figure, has it a little better (which is why I was rooting for Arizona to beat them this weekend), only having to face the Chiefs and Saints (both at home) and the Panthers on the road for their tough games.

As for the division, thanks to everyone else being terrible and all losing this weekend, we still have a 3-game lead over the Cards with five weeks to go.  The way Palmer & Co. are playing, go ahead and salt the division away right now.

So, nothing is fucked here!  We’re home for 3 of 5, we get the plummeting Panthers this weekend on Sunday Night Football, and all should be right with the world!

The Seahawks Lost To The Stupid Saints

What can you say about a game like that?  It’s a game the Seahawks certainly SHOULD HAVE won, but gagged away in spectacular fashion.  The offense was so clearly inept (and has been 4 out of the 7 games we’ve played this year) that you really have to wonder whether this team has what it takes.

I’m over talking about Russell Wilson’s injury.  I’m over talking about the youngest and cheapest offensive line in the league.  I’m over talking about Christine Michael being disappointing and Thomas Rawls still being out.  That’s a Saints defense over there that is, without a doubt, one of the most PATHETIC in the entire league.  And we couldn’t put up more than 13 points on ’em?  Don’t forget, the Seahawks got a defensive touchdown, which REALLY puts the exclamation point on how truly awful the Seahawks have been on offense.

The Seahawks should have been able to roll out there with San Francisco’s quarterback situation, Minnesota’s offensive line situation, and fucking Jacksonville’s running back situation and STILL put up 30 points on those losers!  There is NO EXCUSE for how poorly the Seahawks played on offense against this team.

Darrell Bevell (and, by extension, Pete Carroll), you need to pull your head out of your ass and run the ball more, PERIOD!  Stop being cute and just run the fucking ball like you did on the first drive of the second half.  Want the O-line penalties to go away?  RUN THE FUCKING BALL!  Want to improve your average on 3rd down?  RUN THE FUCKING BALL ON FIRST AND SECOND DOWN!

You didn’t need all the trick plays and the reliance on Russell Wilson to get a win in this game; you just needed to slow the game down, play smashmouth football, and let the Saints try to over-do it on their end.  Instead, like last week against Arizona, you’re getting out-Seahawks’d by teams who have no business beating us at our own game!

Why is ARIZONA the one sticking to the running game even though it’s not giving them more than 4 yards per carry?  Why is it NEW ORLEANS who managed 35 rushing attempts even when they were down by double-digits at one point?  That’s what the SEAHAWKS should be doing!

Don’t think Russell Wilson doesn’t deserve some of the blame.  I know he’s calling out of some of these running plays because he wants to try to do too much.  And, you know what?  On the last play of the game, when you’re talking about a quick slant to win the game, maybe don’t worry so much about the protection and worry A LOT MORE about making sure the wide receiver audibles to the correct play, and not a fucking fade route to the back corner of the fucking endzone!

It’s not that difficult!  But, God damn, are the Seahawks trying to MAKE it difficult, on themselves!

Luckily, the NFC is pretty inept, and everyone besides Dallas has at least 2 losses through 8 weeks.  But, if we want to get where we think we deserve to go, we better fucking earn a top 2 seed in the playoffs!  And that means not throwing these games away that we should be winning!  That’s an easy conference win that we just fucked off, at a time where the schedule gets considerably tougher.

So, way to fucking go Seahawks!  You managed to go 0-1-1 against two teams you should’ve beaten, and in the process kept yourselves firmly OUT of the driver’s seat in this weakened NFC.  Hopefully, your November goes a helluva lot better than your October.

No kudos this week.  Kudos are for closers.  You’re lucky I’m even giving you the steak knives.

What’s Wrong With The Seahawks?

You know what?  Fuck the Rams, there I said it.  This isn’t about them.  Fuck that game, fuck everything.  I’m talking about the Seahawks here (it’s not ALL ABOUT YOU, RAMS!!!).

This is the point in the season where everyone freaks the fuck out and asks, “What’s wrong with the Seahawks?”  Truth be told, this moment hit us a week earlier last year, as we had the misfortune of playing the Rams in Week 1 (why the SHIT can’t we have our first game against the fucking Rams in Week 11?  Why’s it always gotta be EARLY in the season?), but once again, here we are.  And once again, we’re asking the same question.

Of course, everyone also has an answer to this question, because EVERYONE’S GOTTA BE A BLOGGER NOW!  Or, at the very least, everyone’s gotta be a Twitter cunt who spends all day every day bombarding the beat writers with their insanity.

What’s wrong with the Seahawks?  A shitload!

And, unsurprisingly, I’m going to start with the offensive line.  Most fans would point to them and call them Public Enemy Numbers 1-5.  Most in the national media keep harping over how little we spend on our line, either via draft capital or free agency dollars.  Some of the savvier local bloggers like to defend the O-Line as much as possible, pointing to things like Russell Wilson holding the ball too long, or how they haven’t been “that bad” compared to the level of competition we’ve played through the first two weeks.

I’ll say this:  the offensive line IS a problem, and it’s probably the biggest problem.  It’s the reason why the Seahawks can’t effectively move the football against anyone with a Top 10 defense.  You can deflect blame all you want, but turning Russell Wilson into a pocket passer who gets the ball out in 2 seconds or less isn’t going to make a difference.  This isn’t the New England offense, and he isn’t Tom Brady.  He’s a guy who needs time for plays to develop, so he can make plays downfield.  If we’re going to try to be this quick-strike offense (and make no mistake, it’s 100% because the O-Line is terrible and can’t hold a block for more than 0.5 seconds), you know what that’s going to lead to?  10 guys in the box, press coverage on the outside, and a complete and utter inability to formulate a running game.

The Seahawks don’t dink & dunk.  The Seahawks play smashmouth football, with regularly executed deep strikes through the air.  I’d rather have Russell Wilson hitting 60% of his passes, with a high average per attempt than have him hit 70% of his passes with a low average per attempt.  On the spectrum of short passers, he’s more closely resembling Sam Bradford than he is Philip Rivers, and that’s NOT what we’ve come to expect out of this offense!

Now, obviously, this problem O-Line would be mitigated if our quarterback could run, but again, whose fault is that?  Oh, that’s right, the sieve of an O-Line that’s letting guys get free runs at our most valuable offensive weapon.  Just because this unit can nut up once every 20 pass attempts and actually block for a reasonable amount of time doesn’t give them a pass for all the times they let guys run free and clean at our quarterback!

At the very least, you could hang your hat on this team having a viable running game.  Even against the very best defenses, we’d ALWAYS be able to get yards on the ground to help matters along.  But, we haven’t been able to do a damn thing on the ground this year!  Thomas Rawls is a fantastic running back, and he’s getting hit in the backfield more in these first two games than he did ALL of last year!  It doesn’t seem to affect Christine Michael as much, but I’ve noticed he doesn’t always stick with what the play calls for.  He’s a guy who’s always naturally going to want to bounce things outside, to get into open space and see if he can make some moves for some home run-type plays; but he’s been doing that WAY more than usual, and it’s been out of necessity.  Rawls is great, but he doesn’t have Michael’s quicks or his cutting ability, but that’s neither here nor there because he didn’t have those things LAST year either, when he was averaging 5.6 yards per carry!

Of course, Wilson’s injury doesn’t help matters any in the running game either.  A hobbled Wilson means defenses don’t have to worry about him tucking and running, which means they can focus all their energies on the back he inevitably hands the ball off to.  You’d think that would lead to more traditional handoffs, where Wilson takes the ball from under center – so at the VERY least we can make better use of play-action in the passing game, to try to open things up that way – but NOPE!

Because ultimately, this falls squarely on Darrell Bevell’s shoulders.  He spent the better part of these first two games running an offense with a healthy Russell Wilson in mind, when he should’ve been adjusting for the fact that Wilson can’t run.  At this point, you have to dig deeper into the playbook.  Recall that Tarvaris Jackson was once this team’s starter, and try to remember what plays HE used to run.  Because, let’s face it, Tarvar was never a running quarterback, and right now, neither is Russell Wilson.

Oh, and the best part?  They STILL haven’t figured out how to get the ball to Jimmy Graham in the redzone!  Oh, what a joy it’ll be, when people can’t fall back on the Seahawks “bringing him along slowly” routine and we return to the weekly lament about how Graham gets no redzone targets because Darrell Bevell is a mental midget and Russell Wilson is a literal one.

And don’t think the defense is getting off any easier in this thing.  You want a medal for holding the Dolphins to 10 points and the Rams to 9?  Bravo, you did your fucking job against two inept quarterbacks.  You look to be well on your way to another league championship in fewest points given up, but you’ll also forgive me if I don’t line you up to suck each of your dicks.

Hey guys, where’s the fucking turnovers?  Are you shitting me?  You can’t get teams led by Ryan Tannehill and Case Fucking Keenum to turn the ball over to you?  When – SPOILER ALERT – Keenum threw 2 picks against the 49ers last week, and Tannehill did the same against the Pats this week (on top of a couple of fumbles the Pats were able to force)!  I mean, shit guys, how about a short fucking field for once!  How about making it so the offense doesn’t have to fucking go 90 yards for a touchdown every God damn drive!  How about, when our offense flips the field position, and we’re able to down the ball inside the 10 yard line, you NUT THE FUCK UP and force a 3 & Out to give us BACK our good field position???

You have to understand, Michael Bennett and all the rest, that you haven’t done shit yet.  The defense has been good, but not great.  Not dominant.  Not elite.  An elite defense would’ve held the Rams to 3 points, or 0 points, not 9.  An elite defense would see that their offense is in trouble, that their best skill position players (from Baldwin, to Lockett, to Graham, to Rawls, to Prosise) are banged up, and their all-world quarterback is a shell of his former self as he tries to play through a high ankle sprain, and that elite defense would step the fuck up and shut out an offense like the Rams.  Like the Dolphins.  Like the 49ers next week.

And that defensive coordinator needs to realize his defense is giving up too many big plays.  Dan Quinn and Gus Bradley knew how to scheme well and prevent those big plays.  This has only become a problem since Kris Richard took over.  Maybe the job is too much for him.  Well, management better fucking figure that shit out and put someone in there who’s up to the task.  Because, we can’t be fucking away these seasons when everyone is in their prime, just to coddle a fucking defensive coordinator who isn’t ready for the fucking job.

Beat the 49ers you sacks of shit!  Or, don’t be surprised when you see more 12s dumping all over you.

Seahawks Win Yet Another Seahawky Game

It was just one of those fucking things, you know?  Be happy with the victory and try to forget about it.

Except, how can we, what with Russell Wilson’s ankle injury sure to dominate the local conversation this week?  I’ll say this about the play:  it sure LOOKED like an accident, the way Ndamukong Suh hit him, causing his ankle to twist an unnatural way, but that big fucking galoot – known for more than his fair share of intentionally dirty hits – sure has a knack for injuring guys.  When you’re as athletic and as talented as Suh, there’s a way to make that play where it doesn’t hobble our quarterback.  Likewise, when you’re as athletic and as talented as Suh, you probably learn new ways to make dirty hits look “accidental”.  So, fuck that guy, I hope his ACL snaps real soon.

By all rights, the Seahawks should’ve lost that game.  On top of the fact that Russell couldn’t move after his ankle injury, the team in general couldn’t run the ball whatsoever.  That made us one-dimensional for most of the game, and with our makeshift O-Line against their front four full of studs, we had to be extra careful in the passing game, often limiting us to shorter, quicker throws.  Since we’re not the San Diego Chargers, and our quarterback isn’t Philip Rivers, that’s not exactly our forte, and we struggled accordingly.  By and large, we weren’t getting open in the conventional ways we normally get open, which left us grasping at straws on third down.  It wasn’t until that final drive where we hit on a couple of 4th down conversions, but we pretty much started out that drive in 4-down territory, so that likely dictated our play-calling on 3rd down.

Defensively, we were as savage as I can remember.  But, again, PROBABLY should’ve lost that game.  Kenny Stills got behind everyone, only to drop what would’ve been a HUGE touchdown early in the game.  Earl Thomas struggled like I can’t remember him ever struggling before.  There were more missed tackles than I like to see.  But, for the most part, the defense was on point.  The Dolphins had five 3 & Outs and had to punt 7 times on the day.  There was another critical stop by Kam Chancellor early in the game on 4th down that at the very least prevented them from scoring 3 points.  That’s on top of a mammoth blocked field goal by Cassius Marsh early in the 4th quarter to keep our 3-point lead intact.

Indeed, the way the defense was going, I wondered if we could hold on and make it a 6-3 final.  But, of course, as soon as I started to seriously maintain that line of thinking, midway through the 4th quarter, the Dolphins finally managed a competent scoring drive to take a 10-6 lead.  I’d be curious to know if, defensively, we played that drive any differently than we had up to that point.  From my naked eye and limited football acumen, it didn’t look totally out of character:  lots of zone, a blitz or two sprinkled in.  But, it was almost shocking the way the Dolphins were able to get in the endzone, considering how much we’d dominated them to that point.  It’s not fair to expect a defense to be perfect for a full game, but there you go again:  another lead blown by that unit late in the game, in remarkably easy fashion.

I was pretty sick about the whole thing once Miami went ahead.  The Seahawks got the ball back with a little over 4 minutes to go in the game, and with the way Wilson was immobilized, and the way our offense had performed in general, it wasn’t looking likely we’d go down there and score a touchdown.  Then, I remembered I was the only person left in our Eliminator pool who didn’t pick the Seahawks this week, and I knew the gambling gods wouldn’t let me win it all in Week 1 (the fact that I had the Cardinals, who would go on to lose later that night, was further proof that the gambling gods hate me to no end).

Sure enough, the drive started out bumpy as hell, but the Seahawks put themselves in position to win it, and did so with a nifty little fade to Doug Baldwin on the left side of the endzone.  We’d go on to miss the extra point – because apparently that’s what the NFL likes:  ineptitude – but it would go on to not matter, because our defense quickly rediscovered our edge and made mincemeat of Ryan Tannehill.

Christine Michael got the start in this one, and looked okay, but also looked like he biffed a couple of assignments.  Thomas Rawls nearly matched him touch for touch, in spite of the discrepency in snaps (Michael out-snapped him by a wide margin), and while neither of their numbers were all that impressive, I liked the way they looked together.  Rawls will get you those difficult yards Marshawn Lynch used to get; Michael will slash and dash for large chunks of yardage, and is the consummate home run threat at tailback.  Just when a defense figures out how to stop one guy, you bring in the other for a total change of pace.  It does nothing for me in fantasy – as long as both are healthy, they both remain non-starters for fantasy purposes – but as a fan, it’s as much as I could’ve hoped for, what with Lynch’s retirement and all.

Doug Baldwin, on the other hand, is a guy you MUST start in fantasy, as he’s definitely Russell Wilson’s go-to guy, particularly in or near the red zone.  Yesterday, he caught 9 balls for 92 yards and that game-winning touchdown, and I think it’s just the start of a legitimate Pro Bowl season.

Tyler Lockett didn’t do a whole lot, and had a couple drops (one of them punched out by Byron Maxwell, but even then, had he caught it cleanly to begin with, he might’ve been able to hold onto it through contact).  He’ll need to do better, as Wilson looked his way early and often on third down in this one, resulting in a couple drives being stalled.

Jimmy Graham got into it a little bit.  I didn’t see him at all in the first half, but he played pretty regularly in the second half, though he looked like more of a decoy than anything else.  Nevertheless, he did catch one ball on that touchdown drive to get us a first down en route to the endzone.  Assuming he feels no ill effects from the game, I look forward to his re-emergence as the team continues to bring him slowly back.

C.J. Prosise had a nifty catch and run for a first down early in the game, but had to leave with a sprained wrist.  I don’t know what that means for his availability going forward – he might miss a game or two – but it sure limits us on third down.  Where’s Troymaine Pope when you need him?  Oh, right, with the Jets.

Defensively, I don’t know where to start, except yes I do, and it’s Bobby Wagner.  Oh man, WHAT A GAME!  He didn’t lead the team in tackles, but the ones he made sure counted, as all 6 were solo tackles.  He also had a couple QB hits, and they weren’t cheapies.  That’s what I talk about when I talk about a guy making his presence felt.  Wagner had his hands all over this game.

K.J. Wright was the leading tackler with 11, and he too had a QB hit, as well as a sack, and a tackle for loss.  The rest of the NFL has been slow to catch on to his greatness, but he’s the main reason why you’ll hear people around the Seahawks say this team has the best linebacking corps in the league.  He’s also the main reason why you don’t totally dismiss those people out of hand for their homerism.  Wright and Wagner, as far as one-two punches at the linebacker position are concerned – particularly with the way most teams ONLY play two linebackers, with how pass-wacky the league has become – are as good as any one-two linebacker punches in the league.

Richard Sherman stood out, one for his obvious dominance in coverage, as I don’t recall him letting anyone catch anything around him, but also for his tackling.  He made a couple of the most impressive open-field tackles in the game, where had he missed, they would’ve gone for huge gains.  Never take for granted Sherman’s tackling; it’s truly a precious and wonderful thing.

DeShawn Shead gets his own set of kudos.  The whole secondary played pretty well, aside from Earl on a few bad plays that stuck out like a sore thumb, but Shead looked like the real deal Holyfield.  The L.O.B. has had a number of quality cornerbacks opposite Richard Sherman.  Brandon Browner famously made the Pro Bowl in 2011 and helped give this unit its edge in its infancy, Byron Maxwell replaced Browner and helped lead us to a championship in 2013 before going on to a huge free agent payday, but Shead might be the best of them all.  He broke up a couple passes, and was an all-around force the likes of which I haven’t seen since teams stopped trying to challenge Richard Sherman in 2014.  I’m fully on the bandwagon now; look for Shead to have a HUGE year this year.

The D-Line as a whole stepped up in a big way.  Bennett, Avril, Clark, and even Marsh all had sacks on the day.  The Nascar lineup looks as fast and disruptive as it was in 2013.  And, the interior didn’t disappoint, holding the Dolphins to only 64 yards on 3.2 yards per carry.  Also, hat tip to Jarran Reed for two big batted balls at the line of scrimmage.  I hope that’s, like, a thing he’s randomly, weirdly good at, because it would be huge for our interception numbers this year.

Also, let’s go ahead and give kudos to Marsh again, as well as Mike Morgan on special teams.  Marsh had that blocked field goal, as well as a couple monster hits on returns.  And, if it wasn’t Marsh, it was Morgan who was always around the runner with the ball, ensuring his immediate introduction to the turf.  Can’t say enough about how well we covered punts and kickoffs in this one.

Look, all in all, I’m as not-thrilled as the rest of you with how the game played out.  Obviously, it would’ve been a million times worse had the Seahawks fallen short at the end, but there are positives to take away.  Defensively, in particular.  Reasons for hope on offense include the fact that Wilson was never actually knocked out of the game.  So, the ankle injury can’t be THAT bad.  By the same token, he couldn’t really run on it, and that sucks every dick in the free world when you think about how we’re playing the Rams next week.  Looking better offensively than we did against the Dolphins should be completely off the table right now.  Even winning this game at all is dodgy at best.  Getting Wilson through the game without making the ankle worse needs to be our top priority.  From there, we get a nothing game against the 49ers, followed by another fucking massive D-Line with the Jets.  What was once looking like a viable 4-0 start now has 2-2 written all over it.  I guess the early BYE week this year will actually come in handy for once.

Other reasons for optimism, if you really want to grasp at some straws, is that after this initial 4-game set, we don’t really face a dominating D-Line again until December, when we face the Panthers.  So, you know, we’ve got that going for us.

If by some miracle, we’re able to keep Wilson upright – which, hint hint Darrell Bevell, is going to require you to leave your tight ends in to chip A LOT MORE than you did against the Dolphins – the rest of the skill position players look up to the task of picking up our hobbled QB1.  Fingers crossed.

Part 1: Why The Seahawks Won’t Win The Super Bowl This Year

Consider this the start of a two-part season preview for the 2016 Seahawks.  Anything less would be uncivilized.

Speaking of Right Guard, let’s start there.  One of the primary failings of the 2015 Seahawks – particularly on offense – was the offensive line.  Sure, there were early-season defensive breakdowns that were our regular season undoing, but if you want to look at why the Seahawks lost in the playoffs, look no further than the interior offensive line.  Guard-Center-Guard.

Now, at least in the early going, it appears the Seahawks have vastly improved this combo compared to last year.  Once Alvin Bailey proved he wasn’t up to the task of left guard, the team panicked and put Justin Britt there.  He was a disaster.  Eventually, the team settled on Patrick Lewis at center, and things seemed to improve along the line as a whole.  But, Lewis was far from ideal.  And, we were in J.R. Sweezy’s fourth year with the team; four years that saw him plateau pretty early on, then continue to make the same mistakes in pass protection over and over and over again.

Mark Glowinski – after a year on the bench to learn the position at an NFL level – is ready to be a starting left guard in this league.  Justin Britt – in his third position in three years – seems to have finally found a spot that works for him.  And rookie first rounder Germain Ifedi is being broken into the league at right guard, where he’ll hopefully thrive and eventually shift outside to tackle in the coming seasons.  These three guys should be a marked improvement over the three we had there last year.

And yet … HOO BOY, are we thin!  News came down yesterday that Ifedi left practice with an alleged ankle injury.  The severity is unknown at this time – he could be out for the year, or he could play this weekend – but the fright it’s caused this fanbase is all too real:  who replaces Ifedi if he can’t play this week?  The only other guard on this roster is Rees Odhiambo, who was taken at the end of the third round of this year’s draft.  J’Marcus Webb is another possibility – as he’s played both guard and tackle – but as you can see, we’re already greatly reducing this unit’s effectiveness with these diminishing returns.

WE CANNOT HAVE INJURIES ALONG THE OFFENSIVE LINE!!!

Particularly up the middle, which is where we failed against the Panthers in last season’s playoffs.  Russell Wilson improved on his pocket passing last year, and getting the ball out quicker, but you still need to give him SOME time.  Thinning out the interior of this O-Line – when the tackles are already pretty shaky – is going to be a disaster this team won’t be able to recover from.

But, you know, anyone could write a preview about why a team won’t make the Super Bowl and put “Injuries” as the leading cause.  Let’s face it, if your quarterback goes down, you’re not winning the championship.  If too many key offensive or defensive playmakers get injured, you’re not winning the championship.  And so on and so forth.  So, let’s move on.

Another big concern for me has to do with the defensive line.  I still don’t see us having the type of pass rush we had in 2013, and I don’t think we ever will.  Avril and Bennett are great, but Frank Clark is still young and unproven.  And I just don’t see anyone behind those three guys who will have much of an impact.  Does that mean we’ll have to blitz more?  If so, that takes away from a weak spot that is the middle of our defense.  Teams dink and dunk on us with regularity as it is; sending an extra blitzer just opens up that part of the field even more for converted third downs.

AND, I’m not so sure our run defense is up to snuff.  This is the first year in forever that we won’t have Brandon Mebane anchoring the middle.  Will Rubin, Reed, and McDaniel be able to pick up that slack?  There were a lot of times this pre-season where I wasn’t exactly thrilled with the first defense’s ability to stop the run.  Let’s hope that mess is left where it belongs:  in the meaningless pre-season.

All in all, I wonder if this is the year where the Seahawks finally fall from the top in points allowed.  It’s been a record-breaking four year run of dominance, and it’s bound to end at some point.  Part of me wonders if teams have figured us out, and part of me wonders if Kris Richard will be a new whipping boy, a la Darrell Bevell.  Kris Richard can pay lip service all he wants about not changing the scheme from years past, but he’s still the one calling the plays, and this is only his second year doing that job.  Are we sure his situational play-calling abilities are good enough for the NFL?

I mean, come on, if the players are mostly the same, and the scheme is the same, then it has to be the play-calling, right?

Of course, to really derail the Seahawks, they’ll have to lose a few games they shouldn’t.  More defensive lapses like last year.  More oddball defeats to the likes of the Rams, Eagles, or Dolphins.  Arizona will have to be as good as I think they’ll be, and run away with the division again.  The Packers and/or the Panthers will have to be another dominant NFC team.  If we let too many regular season games slip away, and prove we can’t beat the elite teams like last year, we’ll once again be 10-6 and looking at a Wild Card path to the Super Bowl.  Unfortunately, as much as I’d like to believe it, I just don’t think the Seahawks are able to cruise through the regular season and then flip a switch come playoff time.  Hell, last year they SHOULD have lost to the Vikings in the first round!

Finally, I’d say there’s one big concern no one really wants to talk about.  Russell Wilson had one of the better second halves to a season that I’ve ever seen last year.  Rightly, everyone is on his bandwagon for him to continue that trend – possibly with an MVP finish.  Did Wilson figure it out, and take that next step in his development?  Or, is this a matter of momentum?  Because, we all know there’s no such thing as momentum, and it could just as easily go the other way starting Sunday.

In the pre-season, I saw good Russell Wilson and I saw bad Russell Wilson.  I saw the guy who makes quick decisions and rips off chunk passing plays, and I saw the guy who holds the ball too long and takes unnecessary sacks.  It’s the pre-season, so I’m willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.  But, I don’t think anyone goes from Good to Elite without some bumps in the road.

If he does regress, though, with the way this team is counting on him to carry us all the way, it could be a total disaster.

It takes a lot going right for a team to win a Super Bowl.  Luck, obviously, plays a huge factor.  This team has what it takes to go all the way, but there are a good number of other teams who can say the same thing.  Arizona, Green Bay, Carolina, New England, Pittsburgh, Kansas City, Houston, Jacksonville, Washington, Oakland, Cincinnati.  We’re damn near through half the league!

So, yeah, I’d say the odds are stacked against us in a number of ways.  Tomorrow, I’ll write about how none of that matters.

The Seahawks Finally Beat A Good Team

Not for nothing, but that game was EXACTLY what the doctor ordered.

Let’s face it, the defense won’t be dominant forever.  Depending on the opponent, the defense might not even be all that good.  It’s a hard truth akin to finding out there isn’t actually a Santa Claus, and one we’re all going to have to come to realize in our own time.  Some of you might be holding out hope, arguing that those are just the Legion of Boom’s HELPERS you’re seeing at every shopping mall.  But, in a quiet moment of reflection, ask yourself this:  do you feel confident that the Seahawks can hold down the best offenses in football, the way we had for the most part from 2012-2014?

I don’t know if I do.  Which means:  we’re going to need to lean on our offense now more than ever before to win us ballgames.

There are various monkeys the Seahawks got off their backs with this win over the Steelers.  For starters, the 2015 Seahawks finally beat a team with a winning record.  Indeed, should they keep some semblance of health, the Steelers should even be a playoff team.  So, that’s encouraging.  We took the best shot against one of the best passing games in all of football, and we dished it back out to them.  Even more encouraging is that this wasn’t some miracle comeback like we’ve been prone to witness.  The Steelers didn’t jump out to a 20-point lead for us to overcome; this was nip & tuck the whole way through, neither team going ahead by more than one score until the very end, when the Seahawks scored on that 80-yard touchdown to Baldwin to go up 9 points with two minutes to go.  After the Steelers broke the 0-0 tie with a field goal, there were SEVEN lead changes the rest of the way!  No huge lulls by the offense (except maybe for the bulk of the third quarter), and probably most importantly, no turnovers by the offense.

The other major monkey, of course, was that the Seahawks finally beat a team when that team scored over 25 points or some absurd number.  It’s not like the Seahawks NEVER score in the 30s under Pete Carroll and Russell Wilson, but it’s just that usually the other team is held in check.  We’ve never won a shootout with those principles in place, breaking I believe (off of memory) a 12-game losing streak.  Dating back to the beginning of the 2014 season (when we finally had Percy Harvin healthy, and we were expecting this team every week to look like they did in the Super Bowl against Denver), Seahawks fans have been wondering when the offense would finally surpass the defense.  It might be safe to say that moment happened yesterday, against a Steelers defense that isn’t necessarily amazing, but has had its share of success in carrying that team to a potential Wild Card berth with Roethlisberger missing much of the season.

Then again, that’s probably just me overreacting to recency bias in a 1-game sample.

If you take a closer look at that game, ugly as it was from a defensive perspective, there’s actually some promising elements to take away.  For starters, Richard Sherman had himself a day!  He finally nabbed his first interception (after a season’s worth of dropped picks) on a day where he shadowed the best receiver in the league, holding Antonio Brown to 51 yards on 6 receptions.  Obviously, the elephant in the room is Markus Wheaton’s 9 catches for 201 yards and a touchdown, which points to an obvious lack of depth in our secondary.  But, it also points to Ben Roethlisberger being the best deep ball passer in the entire league, not to mention the Steelers are absolutely fucking loaded at the wide receiver position.  When a guy like Wheaton is your third receiver, I’d say you’re pretty loaded.  For what it’s worth, though, I thought DeShawn Shead looked pretty good in his first real extended look as the team’s corner opposite Sherman.  He found himself playing catch-up a lot to the speedy Martavis Bryant, but he recovered well enough more often than not to hold him to 5 catches for 69 yards.

On a quick side note, can you imagine what this game would’ve become had Cary Williams not been benched entirely and kept inactive?  I don’t think we’ve seen the last of him in a Seahawks uniform, considering Burley can’t keep himself healthy, but his days as a starter here HAVE to be over.

It’s honestly weird to praise a unit that helped give up the most passing yards in franchise history (Roethlisberger threw for 456 yards, with Landry throwing for another 34 yards once Big Ben went out with a concussion), but we were going to struggle against this passing attack regardless; even at our peak back in 2013, we still would’ve given up yards in bunches.  But, there’s reason for optimism, if for no other reason than we won’t see a passing attack NEARLY this good again until the final week of the season (when the Cardinals may or may not be resting starters, as they will likely have locked themselves into the 2-seed at that point).

Getting back to the offense, it was good to see Wilson getting the ball out on time, in the rhythm of the offense.  Also, when your offense scores six TDs and is perfect in the red zone, I think you HAVE to be obligated to praise the offensive coordinator.  I give Darrell Bevell a ton of shit – and rightfully so – but I also have to give him credit when it’s due.  He’s still as inept as the day is long when it comes to calling plays for 2-point conversions (seriously, a fade to Kevin Smith?), but in the end it didn’t totally screw us over, so I think I’ll let it slide (as if he cares what I think).

Finally, big ups to Baldwin, Kearse, and Graham for catching damn near everything in sight.  It’s tough losing Graham for the season, but I tend to side with the people that believe this will free the OC and quarterback in their decisionmaking, as they won’t necessarily have to cater to anyone’s ego when calling plays and dishing out passes.  Mix in a little good ol’ fashioned Ewing Theory, and we might be poised for a timely and important streak of wins!

Hapless Seahawks Narrowly Edge Hapless Cowboys

At that spot near the end of the game, where it was clear the offense was playing it safe – playing not to lose – by keeping the clock running and settling for the go-ahead field goal to make it 13-12 with a little over a minute left, I was envisioning the blog post I’d write about the game.  The working title in my head was, “Just Fuck You, Darrell Bevell”.  I guess that’s why I like to wait until the next day to write this thing (that, and because I’m usually in some form of food/football coma by the end of the day on Sunday, and the three working braincells I have left, I need to get me home).

We have Jimmy Graham.  We spent a great deal to bring Jimmy Graham to Seattle.  We gave up a starting, Pro Bowl-calibre center and a first round draft pick to get Graham and a third rounder.  Jimmy Graham is 6’7, with some of the best hands and leaping ability in the NFL.  He may not be quite as good as Gronk when it comes to purely catching the ball, but he’s close.  We brought him in here because we have a need for a reliable red zone target in the passing game.  That’s priority number one when it comes to Jimmy Graham.  Or, that is, it SHOULD BE priority number one.

And yet, there we were, with a little over two minutes left, at the seven yard line.  The PERFECT spot to utilize Jimmy Graham’s unique physical gifts.  As I alluded to before, the Seahawks were down by two points going into this drive.  They NEEDED a touchdown, which would force the Cowboys to go for a touchdown, which never would’ve happened in a million years because they had Matt Cassel and we had the Legion of Fucking Boom.  The Seahawks scoring a touchdown there might as well have meant the Seahawks scoring a 50-burger there; there was no coming back.  On the flipside, kicking a field goal would mean the Cowboys only needed a field goal of their own to re-take the lead and win the game.  As the announcers mentioned during the game, Dan Bailey is the most accurate field goal kicker in NFL history.  They were also playing indoors.  He had also in that game nailed a 52-yarder like it was nothing.  The Seahawks playing it safe and settling for the field goal was putting the game in jeopardy that we didn’t need to do.

Unless you don’t trust your quarterback, which is another conversation altogether.

You know what I love about how New England utilizes Gronk?  When they’re down near the goalline, they’ll line him up wide (sometimes on an island, sometimes with another receiver in the slot).  If he’s on an island, and he’s being guarded by a lone cornerback, then it’s just an easy hitch route or fade route, pitch n’ catch, touchdown.  It’s the bread and butter of the Pats’ offense.  If he’s on an island and they’re double-covering him, then more than likely you’ll get the middle of the endzone wide open.  Or, you can throw a screen the opposite way and have the numbers in your favor.  Or, shit, you can just run the ball up the middle because there won’t be enough defenders in the box.  There are any NUMBER of options at your disposal when you use your weapons effectively like the Patriots do.

Let’s say you put Gronk out wide, with a receiver in the slot; I don’t even need to tell you what comes next.  Gronk runs a slant, or an in-route, and picks off the other receiver’s defender, while the receiver runs an underneath out-route, catches the pass going away from Brady, and easily finds the edge for a touchdown as now both defenders on that side are tangled in a heaping mass of Gronk.  As you can see, I’m not saying that the Seahawks have to get down there and throw it to Graham three times.  But, if we had an offensive coordinator who didn’t have his head so far up his own ass, he might design some plays that utilized Graham as a decoy effectively enough to still get us the touchdowns that we need.

What do we do instead?  We run left, which Marshawn Lynch mystifyingly takes out of bounds.  Ostensibly, this was because the Cowboys were out of time outs and we wanted to drain the clock to the 2-minute warning.  Then, on second down, we run it AGAIN, because there were still seven seconds left before the 2-minute warning.  Once again, the run is stuffed for a loss, but at least now we’ve got two minutes to go, so the Cowboys can’t stop the clock again without an incomplete pass or running out of bounds.  At this point, you have the big decision:  do you drain 40 seconds with another run, kick the field goal, and pray your defense can do what it hasn’t done all year:  hold a close 4th quarter lead?  Or, do you go for the throat, utilize Jimmy Graham smartly, and take a chance at the endzone and really putting this game away?  Granted, in that second scenario, they probably get the ball back with 1:50 left in the game if the pass falls incomplete.  But, when they’ve got a kicker like Dan Bailey, do the extra 40 seconds really matter?

In this instance, I guess it didn’t matter, as we were able to harass Cassel enough into turning the ball over on downs (after an idiotic personal foul penalty on Michael Bennett to start the drive).  But, I argue the Seahawks’ decision was asinine in that situation, and they’re LUCKY it didn’t bite them in the ass.

I can hear you arguing with me now, though.  Yes, I saw the third down play.  Yes, I saw Russell Wilson take the ball on a bootleg, run to his right, and when no one was open, tuck the ball and run for a few yards.  I saw all of that.  But, I would argue – for starters – that the Seahawks never really had any intention of throwing on that play whatsoever, unless there was a complete breakdown in coverage, which obviously wasn’t the case.  I would also argue, if they were serious about throwing the ball, WHY IS JIMMY GRAHAM LINING UP ON THE LINE, INSTEAD OF OUT WIDE???  What have I been writing about all day?  How the Pats use Gronk, and how he helps them become the best red zone team in football.  Why aren’t WE doing THAT???

You know what a roll out near the endzone gets you?  It draws every single defender to that third of the field, as well as the majority of the receivers who are out in the pattern.  It’s like trying to throw the football through a tornado; the odds of completing that pass are almost nil.  And NFL coaches are so pissing-their-pants afraid of throwing back across the field, they almost never send any receivers out the other way, for fear of having the ball picked off and run back to the house.  So don’t give me this shit about the Seahawks trying to throw for the touchdown there; they had no intention whatsoever.  That play may have been a run/pass option, but it was designed to fail from the creator himself, Darrell Bevell.

You want to know why Darrell Bevell has never really been seriously considered for a head coaching job, and why he’ll never ever have one at the NFL level?  Because he’s a chickenshit little loser with impotent play design who could be out-coached by a 10 year old playing Madden.

That’s why, John Schneider, you’re going to have to spend this whole upcoming off-season revamping our offensive line with quality draft picks and free agent signings.  It’s time to cut off Darrell Bevell; he gets no more offensive weapons until he figures out how to play with the ones he has.

Seahawks’ Arrogance Leads To Seahawks Sucking

One of the quotes I took away from Twitter before I had to get off and give myself a little peace of mind last night was from Earl Thomas, when he said, “We know we don’t suck.”

Unfortunately, that’s not true. The Seahawks DO suck right now. When you can’t explain exactly why you’re losing, because there are too many reasons to name, then you just have to throw up your hands and realize it’s the fact that this team just plain sucks right now.

Kris Richard sucks as a defensive coordinator. The defense as a whole sucks at the fourth quarter. No one is able to get consistent pressure on the quarterback late in the game, which means that guys like Michael Bennett and Cliff Avril are playing too many snaps overall. When this team was at its best, Bennett and Avril were playing closer to 60% of the snaps. Now, they’re playing 85-95% of snaps, and they’re gassed at the end of games. Which means players like Frank Clark and Cassius Marsh (suck) are not developing at a rate we need them to. It means when Jordan Hill is injured (which is always, because his body sucks) we have no one on the interior who can generate consistent push.

The book is out on the Seahawks’ defense. Teams know what it takes to beat us, and we’re not adjusting to the way the rest of the league has adjusted to us. It’s this team’s arrogance – and it starts all the way at the top with Pete Carroll – that’s going to be its downfall. The arrogance being:  all you need are elite players while playing a simple style of defense, then let your opponent beat themselves. Well, that’s not working anymore. Because, teams are all too comfortable taking the underneath stuff, and they’re finding the holes in our deep pass defense to generate just enough big plays to make us look bad.

You hate to pile on a guy so early in his career as a defensive coordinator, but it’s pretty clear that Kris Richard isn’t a good defensive coordinator. We’re six weeks in, and what have we accomplished defensively as a unit? When you throw out that Bears game (which, I guarantee they would have scored upwards of 30 points if all their offensive stars were healthy and playing), the Seahawks are giving up 25 points per game. This is elite? This is the same defense we’ve watched the last three years rank at the top in the game? What’s changed from 2014 to 2015 besides Byron Maxwell playing for Philly? There’s no way Byron Maxwell is worth upwards of 10 points per game; the difference is Kris Richard is the guy running the defense. He’s clearly not ready for this much responsibility, and again, going back to this organization’s arrogance, it speaks volumes that they thought he could handle it.

Just stick some guy in there! Some jerk off the street could run the Seahawks’ defense and make it look okay!

Turns out, Dan Quinn was a little better at his job than anyone thought. Good for the Falcons; bad for the rest of us.

Of course, the offense is no better. Yeah, Jimmy Graham had a big day, but he ALWAYS has a big day against the Panthers! He’s made them his bitch since entering the league. But, like I’ve been saying all along, Jimmy Graham doesn’t make this offense go. Throwing it to him 8 times for 140 yards isn’t going to make us the #1 offense in the league. Not when the rest of our guys are held to 10 catches for 101 yards. Not when Marshawn Lynch is held to 54 yards on 17 carries. Not when Russell Wilson was sacked ANOTHER four times.

It’s cute that some of the players are saying that when this team clicks, it’s going to be hard to stop. But, I just don’t see how it’s going to happen. There’s too much going wrong right now. There are too many aspects in which this team truly SUCKS to think that they’ll be able to flip a switch and magically get things going.

It’s the whole Gods N’ Clods thing biting us in the ass like it bites most teams in the ass. When you pay as many players big money deals like we have, then you have to rely on too many guys earning next-to-nothing. We all thought the Seahawks would be immune, because the coaching staff is just too good. What’s happened is, we’ve wildly overestimated their abilities. Our best coaches – Dan Quinn, Ken Norton Jr., Gus Bradley – are working elsewhere. Leaving us with the likes of Richard, Tom Cable, and, of course, Darrell Bevell, left to pick up the pieces and keep this train a rollin’. They’re not up for the task, and as a result a once-great team is staring down the barrell of an 8-8 season.

Maybe a crappy, playoff-free season is just what this team needs to regain its hunger for the game of football. I’m starting to think that miracle finish in last season’s NFC Championship Game was more of a curse than we realized.