It’s not like I’m jumping off the Bandwagon here. It’s more like sometime after the Mariners somehow salvaged the Kansas City series – probably around the moment Ichiro was tagged out at home in the bottom of the 11th last Friday, as I was standing at Safeco Field yelling and screaming with my scorecard in my hand ready to color in the first and only official run of the game – the Bandwagon made an extremely sharp turn to the left, flinging me about 20 yards OFF the Bandwagon. Ever since, it’s been making daily loops, running over my unconscious body, crushing my bones into a pile of bloody mush. So, let me be the first one to officially talk about the 2010 Trade Chips, as I see them. Of course, this was a brief topic of conversation before the season, but let’s get serious, those Paper Players may have played themselves right out of a trade to a contender. Obviously, the biggest and most obvious trade chip is Cliff Lee (pitching tonight). Last year I believe Cleveland got 4 prospects for him; then in the offseason the Phillies got about 3 prospects. So, I’d expect at least 2 prospects in return – unless, God willing, we get a bidding war between multiple contenders. Fingers crossed. After that, you’ve got to figure Vargas and/or Rowland-Smith are on the table. Teams always like back-end of the rotation left-handers, especially ones who post brilliant 1st Half numbers (see: Jarrod Washburn last year). After that, take your pick of anyone in the bullpen; I can’t imagine anyone is all that safe, considering the stable of arms we have in the minor leagues. Figure Aardsma could fetch a nice farthing or two. As far as the bats are concerned, forget it. The only guy who even had a REMOTE chance of being traded in the offseason was Jose Lopez and we found no takers. Now, with him batting under .230, with the 1 home run … sorry jack. The only untouchables on this team are Guti, Ichi, and King Felix … unless you count the rest of our craptastic offense. The only reason they’re untouchable is because they’re radioactive poison. Insert anywhere near home plate with a bat in their hands and they’re sure to nuclear bomb the shit out of any potential scoring opportunity.