Seahawks Re-Sign Kelly Jennings; City Of Seattle Groans, Slaps Forehead

The Seahawks took arguably their weakest position and somehow made it weaker.  It never fails; no team ever bats 1.000 in their free agent signings.  Granted, I wasn’t too hot on the Tarvaris Jackson signing, but I can pretty much dismiss the whole thing (half-heartedly) as the Seahawks breaking all ties with the past and looking toward the future (and, whether Jackson is a part of that future or not, well, we’ll see on the football field).  I’ve kind of moved on from the whole thing, because even though I may be the most skeptical bastard when it comes to Tarvaris Jackson, I still have to hold out the minute smidgen of a chance that I’m not 100% correct in my assumption of his abilities.

And while that type of thinking could easily translate to Kelly Jennings (the No Sure Things Except Death & Taxes theory, combining with a personal philisophy that nothing being ranked ever deserves a 10 out of 10 because you just never know what’s going to come that might be better than the “best”; ditto a 0 out of 10 for the “worst”), I can safely say that I AM 100% without-a-doubt sick and tired of watching Kelly Jennings play football in a Seahawks uniform.

You know how some guys kinda get on your nerves because they’re always getting injured (*cough* TATUPU *cough*) and by them getting injured they directly make your team worse in their absence (*cough* HASSELBECK *cough*)?  Well, Kelly Jennings is the opposite.  No matter how hard you pray to Jesus, feed the homeless, donate blood to the Red Cross, or resist the urge to drown a box of kittens, Kelly Jennings simply WILL NOT get injured.  Even though, in theory, you’re talking about an addition by subtraction.  I’ll never be sure about that theory because he JUST! WON’T! DIE!

I honestly don’t get this move, at all.  Even if it’s just a 1-year deal.  I’m totally flummoxed.  This is a team that’s obviously going young for the sake of being good-to-great down the line.  That’s why 4 of our 5 offensive linemen have no more than 1 full season’s worth of experience.  That’s why we’ve let go our offensive and defensive captains.  Hell, that’s why we didn’t pay an insane amount of money to retain a top-line kicker!  I was fully prepared to enter the 2011 NFL season with Marcus Trufant and a bunch of infants.  At least THEN I could attribute poor secondary play to “growing pains”, with the caveat that “things surely MUST get better.”

Now, when I get poor secondary play, I’m going to look first and foremost to see if Kelly Jennings was responsible.  It’s usually easy to tell:  Kelly Jennings is always the guy flailing on the ground having just missed yet another ankle tackle (that is, when he’s not the guy getting out-leaped by a leprechaun for a bowl of Lucky Charms).


God, it’s never easy.  There’s ALWAYS that ONE guy you can’t stand, who keeps getting chance after chance to prove that he doesn’t belong on the same field as professionals.  The Seahawks have their man.  Let’s hope he’s the only one.

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