Now, I know what you’re thinking. In the wild, a bear would absolutely DESTROY a husky. But we ain’t in the wild; we’re in Husky Stadium. And these Bears be straight up pussy, yo.
I know I’m supposed to be concerned. Ooooo, the defense can’t stop anybody! Ooooo, Eastern Washington still hasn’t won a football game! Ooooo, Hawaii just lost to the team the Washington State Cougars obliterated which means obviously that the Cougars are better than the Huskies because *makes farty sounds with my hand to my mouth*.
Look, I don’t care, I don’t care, I DON’T, CARE! You want to know why?
Who did Cal beat that was so great? They beat up on a 1-2 Fresno State team looking to go nowhere. They eeked out a 3-point overtime victory in Colorado (which did NOT count as a Pac-12 game, because it was a scheduled home-and-home game before the Buffaloes were added to our conference) who is just a terrible team that got killed by the aforementioned already-terrible Hawaii team. And Cal mopped the floor with D-II Presbyterian who went 2-9 last year and 0-11 the year before.
Suffice it to say, this game against the Bears won’t be a matchup of fearsome titans of the gridiron. But, it should be exciting nonetheless.
I don’t care what Vegas has it set at, bet the OVER. Go to your bookie, take the next flight to the Caesar’s Palace, mortgage your house, sell your children, take all of your money and bet it on the OVER! Be prepared to see highlight plays galore. It’s almost a shame I’m going to be too drunk to remember it (all these tailgates are bound to take their toll eventually).
As for being worried, that’s just silly. Why would I worry about the Cal Bears? I mean, I’m not coming on here predicting a victory, or predicting that we’re going to roll over them by 30 points, but come on! The Huskies are at home, they just got pounded defensively by Nebraska in yet another embarrassing performance, and yet the Husky offense still showed it can throw up 38 points against a top-flight, top-1o defense! How is CAL going to stop us?
Maybe I am guaranteeing a victory. Our offense is humming along in a way I haven’t seen it, probably ever (again, I haven’t been a Husky fan for my whole life, so I’m sure there were some amazing offenses in the 1990s). Steve Sarkisian’s play-calling is absolutely destroying defenses, and it’s a beautiful sight to behold.
I think with us being at home, with our offense being unstoppable, and our defense fired up just enough, we’ll make some big plays (turnovers, forced fumbles, quarterback pressures) and do just enough to squeak out a single-digit victory. It may get hairy at the end of the game (as it always does when our defense gets tired and can no longer keep up with the other team), but we’ve proven we have just enough in us to stop them when it counts (Nebraska notwithstanding).
No worries from this Dawg fan. I may change my tune on Saturday afternoon, but right now, it’s all sunshine & lollipops.