All I Can Say Is: Wow, I’m An Idiot

But, in my defense, I have to say:  Eli Manning is the worst fucking quarterback I’ve ever seen!

OK, maybe not the “worst”, but he’s pretty much the most overrated (and yes, I am including Tony Romo in those who are LESS overrated).  Three interceptions, most of them TERRIBLE decisions with two or three defenders around his intended target.  And, I’ve never seen a guy catch more bullshit lucky breaks than Eli fucking Manning.  First of all, he’s a Manning.  And since his brother is one of the best quarterbacks of all time, Eli – by association – is highly regarded without having done a damn fucking thing.  Then, when talking about luck, I mean JESUS!  How many of these jump ball one-in-a-million catches are his receivers going to pull down?  First the Helmet Catch, which might have been the most insane catch of all time, and now that one handed bobble catch today to Victor Cruz for the touchdown early in the 4th quarter.

I’m telling you, Eli is living on borrowed time due to some amazingly athletic catches of his receivers.  They should be tar and feathering him in New York tonight for the performance he gave them.

On the flipside, I don’t know what to tell you.  The Seahawks are just flat-out better than I ever could have imagined!  Does that mean they’re actually good?  Of course not.  But now I’m pretty much convinced we’re destined for a .500 season and a first pick in the teens in next year’s draft.  Who knows, maybe if we’re SUPER DUPER FUCKING LUCKY, Pete Carroll and company will try to squeeze one more year out of this team before drafting our Quarterback of the Future.

And meanwhile, the rich will get richer in Indy because surely they’re going to be the Suck For Luck champions.

I hate everyone and everything right now.

I guess that’s not really true.  I mean, I really have to admit – aside from this quarterback situation we have (which is like watching 100 abortions in a row) – this team is blossoming before our very eyes.  There is a LOT to like about some of the individual efforts on this team.

The offensive line is improving week-to-week, which is EXACTLY what the doctor fucking ordered after the last two years of QBs running for their bloody lives.  Our secondary looks to be on the cusp of being among the top five in the game.  Browner, Chancellor, AND Earl Thomas all had picks (Browner for the clinching TD).  When you tack on Thurmond having a solid game with 2 passes defended, and Trufant’s veteran leadership whenever it is he returns from injury, and you’re looking at a HUGE liability the past few seasons turning into a HUGE strength for this team.  And, I know it’s not the best or anything, but our defense got three sacks, on the road, on the east coast, in a 10am start.  In the past, there’s no WAY we ever got that kind of pressure on the quarterback, on the road, on the east coast, in a 10am start.  Impressive all around effort today.

Finally, I gotta say, Doug Baldwin might be the steal of the century.  He had 8 catches for 136 yards and a TD.  On the season, he’s already got 20 catches for 330 yards and 2 TDs in only five games.  He’s far-and-away leading the team, and given a few more of these types of games, you’ll see Doug Baldwin among the best rookie receivers in the entire NFL.  Considering he’s an undrafted rookie receiver, (while some of these other guys were high-round, high-money guys), and that’s just icing on the cake, my friend.

I’m officially eliminating the Seahawks from the Suck For Luck rankings (and drastically reducing the number of teams given this week’s turn of events) and I’m officially going to stop patently rooting against the home team.  In the immortal words of Walter Sobchak:

Ahh fuck it, Dude.  Let’s go bowling.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *