Shoot Me Now: The Mariners Are Still Terrible, August 2013 Edition

12-16.  That’s what the Mariners were in August.  And it took three consecutive wins in Houston to close it out to GET to 12 wins.

This is a bad, boring baseball team.  The shine has worn off of the rookies and the only thing left to look forward to is this team getting rid of more veterans and playing more rookies.

Aaron Harang is finally gone, so that’s a relief.  Mike Morse is also gone, which saves us $1 million.  For a while there, I was trying to give the organization the benefit of the doubt on the Morse/Jaso trade, but now as I read those words I understand how foolish they are.  Why should I EVER give this organization the benefit of the doubt?  They’re TERRIBLE!  They make terrible decisions on a yearly basis!  I should have known as soon as the Mariners did anything, it would be the wrong move.

Taijuan Walker is in the Majors, so that’s fun.  He got a win in his first-ever start and will likely get a couple more before he’s shut down and replaced by someone far less interesting.

Dustin Ackley finished the month on something of a tear.  He finished July batting .215 and finished August batting .258 (going .390/.420/.597 in the month with 6 doubles, 2 triples, and 2 homers).  What does it mean?  We probably won’t know until next year.  Between Ackley and Smoak both turning into less-embarrassing versions of their formerly-terrible selves, I may have to re-think a lot of things going into 2014.

Conversely, Nick Franklin has looked pretty awful of late, so you had to figure that was coming.

King Felix has had a few rocky outings in the past month, which really means very little outside of the Cy Young race (which, let’s face it, is probably out of his range by now anyway).

Look, the bottom line in all of this is that the month of August, 2013, is officially the month where I checked out.  I haven’t watched a full game played by this team in quite some time and to be honest with you, that doesn’t bother me one bit.  I DVR’d Taijuan Walker’s first start because he’s the last interesting thing about the 2013 Mariners.  It’s football season, and this website is going to be All Seahawks All The Time (And Some Huskies) because nobody wants to read about a 4th place baseball team.  And because I don’t want to write about a 4th place baseball team.

So, check back in next month when – SPOILER ALERT – the Mariners will still have been terrible.

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