Shoot Me Now: The Mariners Are Still Terrible, September 2013 Edition

Remember last month when I said that I had checked out of the Mariners?  I wasn’t joking.  Here are two things I gleaned by paying cursory attention to this team in the month of September:

  1. Eric Wedge decided to let his contract expire without signing the extension offered to him by the organization.
  2. James Paxton looked pretty good.

That’s it.

The Mariners finished September with a 9-18 record, which was their worst month of the season.  Granted, we played a lot of teams who either made the playoffs or were close to making the playoffs, but that’s just a terrible month any way you slice it.

I’m going to get around to doing some sort of State of the Union post on the 2013 Mariners and how things look going forward, so I’ll keep this one brief.

Here is all you need to know about the Seattle Mariners in the month of September, 2013:  they played the Houston Astros four times (three at home, with a solo road game that spilled over into this month from a 4-game series that started at the end of August) and they lost all four games.

Now, we have no manager, and the organization is scrambling to do every possible interview it can to stem the tidal wave of indifference that’s overwhelming this team.  Literally within seconds of one another last night, Greg Johns and Ryan Divish tweeted about separate interviews they did with Howard Lincoln.  Normally, this would be like throwing raw meat to a rabid dog for me, but I just don’t think I can muster up the hate anymore.

My inevitable divorce with this team is in the “Sleeping In Separate Beds” phase.  We both know there is a problem – they’re always quick to acknowledge what they’ve done wrong in the personnel realm while at the same time hyping up what little they’ve done right, though at this point it’s falling on deaf ears.  I don’t feel like I can trust this team anymore, because they’ve lied and cheated so much over this rocky period in our relationship.  They keep saying the same things, “I can change!  I can change!”  But, then they fall back into their same old habits and routines of hiring mediocre veterans and managers and front office people.  At some point, “Let’s stay together for the kids” loses its impact.  THE KIDS ARE FUCKING TERRIBLE TOO!

The Seattle Mariners have until Felix Hernandez graduates high school and moves out of the house.  If they haven’t started winning by then, I’m starting divorce proceedings.  Baseball is a boring, overrated sport anyway.

1 thought on “Shoot Me Now: The Mariners Are Still Terrible, September 2013 Edition

  1. Pingback: Beating The Dead Horse: The Mariners Are Still Terrible, April 2014 Edition | Seattle Sports Hell

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