Seattle Sports Hell’s Quarterly Power Rankings, The Third

We’re hitting the home stretch, with four weeks to go.  Playoff scenarios are taking shape, we’re weeding out the contenders from the pretenders, the dregs are tanking accordingly.  So, let’s get right to it with the top 8:

  • Denver:  10-2, last quarter:  #4, first quarter:  #4
  • Cincinnati:  10-2, #2, #3
  • New England:  10-2, #1, #1
  • Arizona:  10-2, #3, #7
  • Carolina:  12-0, #5, #11
  • Seattle:  7-5, #9, #6
  • Pittsburgh:  7-5, #10, #19

I’m sorry, but until Andy Dalton wins a big game at night, I can’t have him as the quarterback of my #1 team.  Considering they go to Denver in Week 16, that should be decided in spectacular fashion.  As for Denver, their defense is legit tops in the league.  They toppled the former #1, so they get to be #1.  The Patriots are just too banged up at too many spots.  Won’t keep them out of the playoffs – and it won’t prevent them from making a lot of noise in the playoffs since they should get a bunch of injured guys back by then – but for now they drop to third.  As for the NFC, I still like Zona over Carolina.  Fuck, Panthers, beat AH good team besides a struggling (at the time) Seahawks and an overrated Packers team.  I can’t WAIT to play the Panthers again in the playoffs, we’re going to destroy them like we usually do!  Pittsburgh rounds out the top 8 as long as Roethlisberger stays healthy.

  • Kansas City:  7-5, #19, #14
  • Minnesota:  8-4, #7, #13
  • Buffalo:  6-6, #14, #10
  • New York Jets:  7-5, #12, #8
  • Tampa Bay:  6-6, #29, #32
  • Indianapolis:  6-6, #15, #20
  • Washington:  5-7, #20, #16
  • New York Giants:  5-7, #13, #9

Quite the turnaround for the Chiefs to crack the Top 10.  I knew they weren’t as bad as their record indicated when they started out so shitty (they had the WORST schedule you could imagine), which probably means we shouldn’t have a ton of confidence in them now.  Can they beat a good team?  That’s the question we’ll be looking to answer as they make a Wild Card spot.  The Vikings are definitely better than what we saw last week against the Seahawks, but they’re also a fringe-quality team who will go nowhere in the post-season.  The Bills when healthy are pretty scary.  The Jets get knocked down for blowing that game against the Bills.  The Bucs make the BIGGEST leap, with Winston’s improved play.  Indy keeps plugging along in one of the worst divisions in football.  I’d really like the Redskins to NOT win the NFC East, so I don’t have to worry about one of the Seahawks tearing an ACL on their shitty field.  The Giants should be dominating that NFC East, but can’t seem to get out of their own way.

  • Chicago:  5-7, #22, #27
  • Oakland:  5-7, #11, #17
  • Houston:  6-6, #30, #29
  • Philadelphia:  5-7, #18, #25
  • Jacksonville:  4-8, #32, #30
  • Atlanta:  6-6, #17, #5
  • St. Louis:  4-8, #8, #12
  • Detroit:  4-8, #28, #21

Any of these teams could beat or lose to any of these teams on any given Sunday.  The Rams are the biggest fallers of the group, having gone 0-4 the last month.  Jacksonville, Houston, and Detroit won some games and improved their standing.  Jacksonville exclusively for that high-powered offense; Houston exclusively for their defense’s return to dominance.  Atlanta is trending WAY downward thanks to Matt Ryan and only Matt Ryan.  That’s all I’ve got for this group of trash.

  • Miami:  5-7, #21, #24
  • New Orleans:  4-8, #16, #22
  • San Francisco:  4-8, #23, #26
  • San Diego:  3-9, #26, #15
  • Tennessee:  3-9, #31, #31
  • Dallas:  4-8, #24, #23
  • Baltimore:  4-8, #25, #18
  • Cleveland:  2-10, #27, #28

Feels weird not having Jacksonville in the bottom spot, but I think Cleveland is as worthy as anyone.  They stink, their only good quarterback is out for the year, and they’re in full-on tank mode (just so they can waste yet another high draft pick on a loser).  Baltimore’s injury woes have finally extended to the quarterback position, as Flacco is missing the first games of his career.  Baltimore will do SO MUCH MORE with their draft pick at 5 or 6 than Cleveland will do with the top pick, mark it.  I think the Saints’ defense is the worst I’ve ever seen.  That’s all I’ve got.  Enjoy restocking the front office you blew up, Miami!

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