The Seahawks signed Ed Dickson for 3 years and $14 million, though only the first year is guaranteed.  He’s played 4 seasons with Baltimore, then 4 more with Carolina, and since he doesn’t produce much on the offensive side of the ball, people think he’s more of a “blocking” tight end.  Of course, his metrics in that area aren’t spectacular, so many fans are wondering what the fuck he DOES do well, to which I would respond:  he’s not Jimmy Graham, so automatically he’s 1,000% better at blocking than anyone we’ve had the last three years.

Let’s see, then the Seahawks signed Maurice Alexander, a safety who was with the Rams for the last four years, released in the middle of last season, apparently after Wade Phillips deemed him unworthy of a roster spot.  I guess the Seahawks know more than the best defensive coordinator in the game.  Either that, or we just signed a nobody who will suck for us.  One or the other.

Since Kam likely won’t play for us again, and the team is apparently shopping Earl Thomas to recoup some draft picks, and the two or three safeties we drafted last year are all unworthy to be starting for us, I’d expect Mo Alexander to be back there giving up 40+ yard touchdowns in no time.

To cap off the free agent spree, the Seahawks signed Jaron Brown – middling wide receiver with the Arizona Cardinals – to a deal of unknown length, and unknown cost.  He immediately slots in as the #3 receiver behind Baldwin and Lockett, and is the default Paul Richardson replacement for the time being.  We’ll see how long that lasts.

These deals obviously don’t really move the needle for me; they all stand as evidence that this team is nowhere near contending for anything in 2018, and quite frankly if you think otherwise, you probably need to have your head examined.  I like Russell Wilson as much as the next guy, but if he couldn’t do it all by himself the last couple years, what makes you think he can do it all by himself now, only with a significantly worse group of players around him?  With the Seahawks either unwilling or unable to spend significant cap dollars to improve this team, you’re putting a lot of hope in a draft class that so far doesn’t feature any picks in the second or third rounds.  Either that, or you’re banking on an insane amount of improvement on roster holdovers – a roster that hasn’t been close to good enough, nor remotely healthy, in the last three years.

Oh, and the perfect capper to the weekend?  Sheldon Richardson decided to take a ridiculously lowball offer from the Vikings on a 1-year deal, WELL below his actual value on the football field.  So, the one constant we could count upon – getting a 3rd round comp pick if/when Sheldon Richardson was poached by another team – just got downgraded to a 4th or 5th rounder, depending on where the dust settles in the whole comp pick formula.  If it isn’t one thing, it’s a-fucking-nother for one of the unluckiest teams in the NFL in the last few years.

I hate sports.  Wake me up when everyone’s dead.