If the Mariners aren’t trying to win this year, then I’m not going to try writing about them on a consistent basis.

Unfortunately, with no NBA in Seattle, and Hockey a few years away yet, that leaves a big, gaping hole in my summer content months. Usually, I try to at least half-ass a week’s worth of blog posts during the MLB season, but this year is just TOO much.

As long as this season keep spiraling out of control, I’m never NOT going to lead each post with a comment about how this team started 13-2, because the mere concept of that grows more implausible by the day. Here’s your regular reminder of how futile this team has been: the record is now 11-30 since that season apex.

Obviously, the Mariners are last in the A.L. West. 12.5 games behind first place Houston at the time of this writing. The Angels are a game better than us, but their team is also considerably better and has underachieved thus far to date. I am basing that last statement on exactly one piece of data: their -18 run differential against our -45. The good news is that, finally, the Mariners have cracked the Top 10 of next year’s MLB draft (if the season ended today, we’d pick 8th). We’re certainly within spitting distance of the worst overall record (6 games ahead of the Orioles with 106 games left to go … yes, I have absolutely initiated the Countdown For Tankocalypse 2019), and if we keep playing like we have over the last 41 games, we’ll get there in no time!

Is there any hope for the future amid all the nonsense? Well, Mitch Haniger apparently leads the American League in strikeouts; I guess that jersey purchase was a little premature. Our best hitters (Narvaez and Santana) are also the worst defensive players in the history of Major League Baseball (approximately). We have just the two competent starting pitchers (Gonzales and Kikuchi) and the bullpen has somehow managed to be even worse than it was this time a month ago. If it weren’t for the occasional Vogel-Bomb, I don’t think this team moves the needle even a teeny, tiny blip on my Interest-Meter.

Saying that I don’t care about the Seattle Mariners isn’t strong enough. I can’t even remember the last time I watched a full game; it might be the Opening Day game I attended in person! Of course, my work schedule plays a pretty significant role in whether or not I can watch during the week, but that still leaves Friday evenings and weekends free, and at this point they’re not even on my mind as options for my free entertainment hours. If the only draw for your team is a pudgy DH, I’d say things have sunk about as low as they can go.

I look at these Mariners and I compare them to a team like the Astros and it’s just depressing! I can’t envision a scenario where all the stars align and this team legitimately contends for a world championship. CERTAINLY not in my lifetime! Maybe not ever?

At this point, if you’re not putting the Mariners in the discussion of Worst Run Franchises In Major Professional Sports, then you’re overlooking one of the ragingest dumpster fires the sporting world has ever produced. I mean, at this rate, the M’s are almost DEMANDING that Scott Servais be fired by their putrid on-field play. At that point, it’ll be Ownership vs. Jerry Dipoto, and you have to wonder how many more days at the helm our embattled GM has left; because in that fight, Ownership wins 100% of the time.

Ideally, the Mariners will stick with the plan to rebuild. But, if the 2019 team stinks TOO hard, and loses 100+ games, then you have to wonder if Ownership will have the stomach. I can’t imagine the attendance numbers will look all that great when it’s all said and done. At that point, it’s only a matter of time before the Mariners renege on their rebuild idea, sign a bunch of Win Now free agents, and do just enough to once again miss out on a Wild Card spot.

If this sounds like something you’ve heard before, then congratulations, you’ve been a Mariners fan long enough for it to be considered a legitimate war crime.

You know, I run a Seattle sports blog that completely neglects the sport of soccer even though the Sounders are a delight year-in and year-out. Instead, I devote an irrational percentage of web space to a team in the Mariners that makes me physically ill. I’m not saying that I’m ready to pick up a new team and start writing about it; but I obviously have no problem DROPPING a team and ignoring them even when they’re in my own back yard.

Maybe it’s time to stop following the Mariners on a daily basis. Rid my Twitter feed of all the M’s beat writers and pretend like they don’t exist. Be one of those fair weather fans who spends their time at games guzzling tallboys and chit-chatting with friends over actually paying attention to what’s going on on the field. If nothing else, it would be better for my psyche.