This Time It Makes More Sense: The Mariners Were Swept By The Padres

When the Mariners got swept by the Tigers at home immediately preceeding this weekend series down in San Diego, it was coming off of a 3-game series win against a pretty good Cleveland Indians squad. While overall the Mariners have been in a free-fall over the last month (since April 24th – when we were 13-8 – we have gone 8-18), that little 3-game oasis had the looks of a possible turnaround. Or, a pulling up from the nosedive. Instead, it was just a mirage, as now the Mariners have lost six in a row.

Losing all three to the Tigers is an outrage. Losing all three to the Padres is pretty understandable. That’s a great baseball team right there!

The Mariners are also – not for nothing – a fucking mess right now. There’s the hitting woes. The shuttling of position players to and from Tacoma (Taylor Trammell continues to fucking rake for the Rainiers, and even Luis Torrens hit a grand slam over the weekend; thus continues the trend of players who leave Seattle and go on to better things *sarcasm emoji*). There’s the injury woes, particularly to our pitching staff (but, obviously, seeping into the everyday players as well). There’s the pitching woes, with the shuttling of relievers to and from Tacoma. That red-hot bullpen was never going to be sustainable, but now even our very best reliever – Kendall Graveman – has landed on the IL.

And, to top it all off, there was a COVID outbreak, of sorts, late last week. One guy either got it or came into contact with someone who had it, and he and his unvaccinated close contacts on the team were forced onto the COVID IL. The Mariners are one of the least-vaccinated teams in all of Major League Baseball which just … I don’t even know. Trying to explain it is only going to make me angry, for a variety of reasons. I don’t have a lot of sympathy for anti-vaxxers in general. Maybe go to medical school and get a legitimate degree before you start thinking you’re smarter than scientists or doctors. Oh, you’re a baseball player? Then shut your fucking mouth and get the fucking shot.

What is that about anything that can go wrong will go wrong? Something tells me that quote originated before the Seattle Mariners were even in existence, but they were definitely saying that about the Seattle Mariners; I know it in my gut.

The Mariners lost 16-1, 6-4, and 9-2. I don’t need to talk about these games. Truth be told, I didn’t see one second of any of them. If anyone was curious, this series dropped our run differential to -52, which is third-worst in all of baseball. I know it’s a long season, and this year isn’t about getting a high draft pick, but if things continue to spiral out of control like this, we could be looking at a VERY high draft pick anyway. Not the worst consolation prize, considering we weren’t going to win a World Series regardless.

In our immediate future, we’ve got a relatively easy slate of games. Six against the A’s (but we usually play them pretty tough), four apiece against the Rangers and Angels (both bad), and then three-game sets against the Tigers, Indians, and Twins. If I had any confidence in the Mariners whatsoever, I’d say this is the part of the schedule where they should rack up a bunch of easy wins. But, now I’m thinking we’ll get a good glimpse into just how bad the M’s really are.

Good teams are supposed to beat the bad teams, that’s what we always say. But, if you’re bad and you lose to the bad teams? That’s laughingstock territory. That’s Guys Losing Their Jobs Land. That’s Panic Moves Ahoy! Wanna see how the cookie crumbles? I’ve got a dried out, expired box of Nilla Wafers ready to meet its maker at the garbage dump.